How to respond gracefully if your personal choices are condemned or criticized

When your personal choices are criticized or criticized, it is important to remain calm and confident. Try to understand what exactly is causing the criticism. This can help you respond better and perhaps even take constructive comments into account. Do not let your emotions get the better of you. A calm response will help avoid conflict and show your confidence. If appropriate, briefly explain the reasons for your choice. Share your thoughts and feelings, but do so without aggression. Remember that criticism often reflects the other person's opinion, not your worth as a person. Recognize that everyone has the right to their own opinion. This can reduce the tension in a conversation. Sometimes it is better to simply remain silent and not enter into a discussion. Not all opinions require a response. If criticism becomes too aggressive or personal, don’t be afraid to set your boundaries and end the conversation. Talking to friends or loved ones who understand and support your choices can help you cope with criticism.

So, how to take criticism without taking offense to yourself - further in our article.

Video: How To Take Criticism Without Getting Defensive

1. Don’t worry about what others think

We often find ourselves trapped by other people’s expectations, worrying about what our friends, acquaintances, or neighbors will think of us. These thoughts can create a real obstacle to self-acceptance and self-love. When we worry about how we will be perceived, a feeling of lack of freedom arises that prevents us from expressing our individuality and developing. Ultimately, this does not allow us to live the life we ​​truly want.

2. Listen to your inner voice

No one has the right to dictate who you are or how you manage your life. Only you know what you really need. Learn to ignore outside pressure and rely on your intuition - it is your best assistant in decision-making. And if you really need advice, seek it from people you trust, who want the best for you and understand your interests. But remember that advice is just an opinion. What helped someone else may be completely inappropriate in your case.

3. Use prepared responses

When someone makes a judgmental remark or criticizes, you can adequately but calmly respond. If you want to avoid unwanted conflict, simply nod to show that you heard, and then switch to another topic. It is important to formulate your arguments at least in your thoughts so that they do not remain undeservedly forgotten.

Here are some possible answers that you can either say out loud or say to yourself:

• "Thank you for your opinion. I appreciate that you wish me well. However, I have thought about it for a long time and have already made a decision at my own discretion. I hope you will understand me."
• "I am who I am, and I do what I think is best for me. Isn't that what everyone does?"
• "Each of us is looking for our own understanding of happiness. My decision will make me happy."
• "Deep down, I feel that this is exactly what I need now. Other opinions will not influence my choice, I am confident in its correctness."
• "Another person might do as you advise, but I trust my experience and convictions."

The next time someone gives you unsolicited advice or starts criticizing your choice, try one of these responses. This will help you let go of the situation more easily and not dwell on unpleasant comments over the next few days.

Have you ever prepared similar responses in case of criticism? I would be glad to hear your thoughts in the comments!

7 Ways to Effectively Respond to an Insult

When someone offends you — be it a friend, a stranger, or even a boss — it's important to remember that there are many ways to respond. Lifehacker offers several strategies that will help you save face and quickly remove tension from the conversation.

1. Insult back

The first impulse after being insulted is to respond in kind. However, this only happens if you:

• Be witty.
• Resolve this in a circle of family or friends.
• Use it to defuse the atmosphere, not to aggravate the conflict.

In other cases, even if you consider yourself a master of wit, responding with an offensive word is the wrong way. You thereby descend to the level of your opponent and show that his words hurt you, which means there may be some truth in them.

2. Make a joke

Instead of responding with an insult, try to ridicule the situation itself. This approach helps reduce the toxicity of the confrontation, and your audience, if you have one, will most likely be on your side.

You can also use an element of self-irony here to throw your opponent off balance and hide the sarcasm.

Example 1: A colleague criticizes your presentation.

Response: “You're right, next time I'll get my five-year-old to help!”

Example 2: A stranger is rude to you.

Response: “Thank you so much, you've opened my eyes to my shortcomings. This will be a great topic to mull over over lunch!”

3. Accept Criticism

Sometimes it's worth examining the words you perceived as insulting. If they come from a loved one, try to see them as constructive criticism. This can be an opportunity for personal growth.

It is important to think about the motives of the interlocutor and understand what could have caused such a reaction.

4. Respond to the intention, not the words

Every insult hides its purpose. Try to voice it to clarify the situation.

For example, in response to rudeness, you can say: “Something serious happened between us, since you decided to hurt me.” This will help not only to unsettle the interlocutor, but also to understand the reasons for his aggressive behavior.

5. Keep calm

If the insult comes from an acquaintance or a stranger, do not show that it has offended you. Such words usually hide insecurity or a desire to take revenge for one's own failures. Keeping calm and smiling will not give the offender the desired effect. You can continue asking questions, ignoring his words.

6. Ignore

Often the best answer is no answer. In the case of Internet trolls, it is better not to react to their provocations at all or to block them. In real life, you also have every right to simply ignore the insult and leave.

An example from history: When a man hit the politician Cato in a public bathhouse, Cato replied to the offender's apology: "I don't remember the blow." This can be interpreted as: “You are so insignificant that I didn't even remember your insult.”

These methods will help you cope with hurtful words and maintain your self-esteem.

7. Turn to the law

If someone has offended you, you may want to consider holding them accountable or at least threatening to do so. Punishment for insults is spelled out in the Code of Administrative Offenses, while slander is already a criminal offense. If your boss is paying attention to your insults, it would be wise to contact the HR department.

It is important to remember: no one has the right to violate your honor, dignity, and reputation. But at the same time, you must also respect others and respond to insults adequately. Otherwise, any advice will be useless.

Video: How to Stop Taking Things Personally

Hi all! In this blog we post useful information on the topic how to take criticism without taking offense to yourself. If you have questions or ideas that we did not cover in our article, write about it in the comments.

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